Wednesday, January 27, 2010

The Wounded Knee Massacre

Hiya Minxes!

In my ever graceful sashay through life... today I decided to take a little tumble down some stairs! I thought to myself: Self, what could I do that would be unexpected, a little kooky and all the while stay active? My immediate (and obvious) answer was of course: Throw myself down 9 concrete steps.

Broken Glasses: $300. Cracked Tupperware: $1.99. First Aid by Kim: 2 glasses of wine (to be awarded). Trying to explain why a grown woman has scrapes all over both her knees: Priceless.

So after a little damaged pride (not too much left in the bank at this point), a few WSIB forms and a bang up spectacle repair (in the form of Todd- who decided I should look like Lisa Loupner) I was perfectly looked after and put directly to work. These babies STING!

I've just called my Suz to let her know: I WILL be at the gym... I just don't know if I'll be able to bend and straighten my legs in any succession.

In order to heal these gashes... I voted for the omega 3 fatty acids found in tuna to keep my blood thin and my skin supple! I also found this handy as I had broken the tupperware that housed aforementioned meal and needed to consume or dispose before making my lunch bag smell like SeaWorld.

Just a can of white tuna (washed) with 2 tbsp of dijonaise and a couple of chives, stalk of celery and scallions- all served on washed Boston Lettuce. I really like the hydroponic lettuce- less grit and sand than some of the earth bound varieties- and the stalks are fairly flexible, making them good for wrapping and stuffing!

Breakfast was (wait for it....) a green monster. This time I made it with some frozen blackberries, so it turned into more of a Purple Monster. Lunch was a cheese string and some baby carrots on the bus- while watching my beloved Little Dorrit! I'm finally on the last episode and I already know that I'm going to miss these characters! I'm not one to READ Dickens, but honestly, ANYTHING Andrew Davies touches turns into pure gold. He's set to do a Middlemarch remake- which I LOVED the first time! It starred Colin Firth's brother and a Gor-Geous Rufus Sewell.

Speaking of Dickens- Today is Family Literacy Day! I try to take great advantage of my local library, and love seeing families and children there (well- as much I like seeing them anywhere really). My Mum and Da took great time and care to read to me and to make sure that it was a priority... I think it's a fabulous value to instill in children. Do you have memories of a favourite book from your childhood- or a special moment reading with your parents or children?

According to the photographic history of my very sophisticated family- I've always had a fondness for reading on the loo... Thanks goes to Kiki and Puddin' for documenting a 5 year old making her mark on the world.

So now... my peeps... I turn to you! I really need some help in the menu planning department. Trying to plan what to have and then cook most of the components is turning out to be a little more daunting than I esteemed. I AM trying to cook at least 2 new recipes a week- and am having a hard time incorporating that agenda with just getting my act together for regular meals (most of which are transported to work). I'm also finding it a pain to try these recipes while cooking for one. I'd love any suggestions you guys might have for planning/sticking to and brown bagging your meal plans.

So, because I've been a little lazy this week- I'll have to catch you up on the rest of the week.

Sunday- I found myself in quite possibly the biggest conundrum I'd been in in some time. After working a midnight into Sunday- I decided it was going to be a quiet night at home. Fireplace on and wine poured with some spinach pizza (deep dish... oops) baked for a lovely evening... I came to a fork in the road. Test the Nation-with the world's most adorable Liberal (don't find THAT very often huh?) Justin Trudeau OR Celebrity Rehab III with the INDOMITABLE Dennis Rodman. I eventually chose Dr. Drew and gang because... well, because I love a train wreck. Honestly, this guy is a disaster of galactic proportions! He tried to tell the group that he was above all the 12-step stuff and that he was smarter than them and he has reached a 'Zen state! Sure- say hi to Gary Busey in Nirvana! or Tarzana... whichever you get to first!

Monday- Robbie Burns day! 251st birthday of Scotland's Favourite Son... wee Rabbie! I celebrated by having some lunch with my Da at Boston Pizza (I have no substantiated proof that the Scots ever colonized Massachusetts, but there's no Nova Scotia Pizza in my hood).

Nah- just kidding... I had this healthy bugger!

Wasn't great... I really like Jim Treliving- but the guy needs to work on vegetarian healthy options at Boston Pizza!

Then, in true Scottish form- we carried on to my FAVOURITE PUB- Up Yer Kilt! A couple of ciders later we carried on for another couple of places til we ended up at my Da's local. There, I honoured Mr. Burns by doing my best "Ode to the French Onion Soup". Again- no real segue, but soup was all I could really muster off that menu that was vegetarian and wasn't deep fried.

Tuesday- Quiet day- 1 packet of no-name vegetable soup with one sleeve of high fructose corn syrup saltine crackers. SEVERAL glasses of water.

So that's a wrap mein liebchen... back tomorrow and let you know how the crusty kneecaps are doing! I hope I can run! Maybe I'll do a day to day photo spread so you can all see how quickly I heal. Wait for the keloids kids... that's my new talent (I'll cover my X-Men regenerating skin talent in another post- it's sorta freaky... I'm an overhealer*)


* This has not been verified by a doctor. It's been downright dismissed in fact, I was told "That's not even a thing". But like Susan Sarandon in Lorenzo's Oil, I won't let the establishment break me.


  1. Ouch lady....looks like Kim did a fabulous first aid patch up infections in your future. In answer to the favorite book when i was a child, it was The Velveteen Rabbit. I will pass along to you the vegetarian sections of the new Healthy Cooking magazine I now have a subscription to, perhaps there will be a recipe or two that will suit your fancy in there. P.S. The french onion soup from the kilt looks divine!

  2. I recommend Polysporin for your's a wonder ointment. I put it on everything! Just looking at your pictures I'm sure your knees ache....poor Mandy.
    My favourite book from childhood was a book with a casette tape "Cinderella" I knew the book by heart, and would just read along with the tape, I can still hear it now! As I got older I remember reading the book "Heidi" with my mom. Good Times!
    The french onion soup looks deep fried, it must have been delicious! the glasses!